My Symphony: This is the Last Time by Keane
For the past few days, I had been going through a lot of cycles of stress, anxiety, depression, remorse and even anger. I completely thought that the whole world is just against me. There were even times when I didn’t get any sleep at all just because of thinking about how I made the wrong choices and ended up in the wrong side of the bed. I just sort of wished that I could just stay in this city, study in the same school for college, be with the same people for the next four years of my life and live practically the same everything all over again. Simply put, I wished that High School wouldn’t end.
And I believe that I’m not the only one who feels this way. I mean, let’s face it. High School is quite cute. With all those rules, constant schedule and basically a cyclical life, being in it had been carefree, fun and definitely enjoyable. But the truth is that being in it is actually getting suffocating and even frighteningly shallow.
But accepting this fact isn’t that easy. We all have to go through emotional days, sleepless nights and overflowing buckets of tears.
Well, I admit I’m not yet over High School, and I’m absolutely not yet over with everything. But after reading an entry by a well-known author (an entry which I’m just about to present to you), I suddenly heard the wake-up call. And it was a bomb.
This goes to all of the graduates of 2010, especially to my batch and more especially, to my friends.
Closing Cycles by Paulo Coelho
One always has to know when a stage comes to an end. If we insist on staying longer than the necessary time, we lose the happiness and the meaning of the other stages we have to go through.
Closing cycles, shutting doors, ending chapters whatever name we give it, what matters is to leave in the past the moments of life that have finished. Did you lose your job? Has a loving relationship come to an end? Did you leave your parents’ house? Gone to live abroad? Has a long-lasting friendship ended all of sudden?
You can spend a long time wondering why this has happened. You can tell yourself you won’t take another step until you find out why certain things that were so important and so solid in your life have turned into dust, just like that. But such an attitude will be awfully stressing for everyone involved: your parents, your husband or wife, your friends, your children, your sister, everyone will be finishing chapters, turning over new leaves, getting on with life, and they will all feel bad seeing you at a standstill.
None of us can be in the present and the past at the same time, not even when we try to understand the things that happen to us. What has passed will not return: we cannot for ever be children, late adolescents, sons that feel guilt or rancor towards our parents, lovers who day and night relive an affair with someone who has gone away and has not the least intention of coming back.
Things pass, and the best we can do is to let them really go away. That is why it is so important (however painful it maybe!) to destroy souvenirs, move, give lots of things away to orphanages, sell or donate the books you have at home.
Everything in this visible world is a manifestation of the invisible world, of what is going on in our hearts and getting rid of certain memories also means taking some room for other memories to take their place. Let things go. Release them. Detach yourself from them. Nobody plays this life with marked cards, so sometimes we win and sometimes we lose.
Do not expect anything in return, do not expect your efforts to be appreciated, your genius to be discovered, your love to be understood. Stop turning on your emotional television to watch the same program over and over again, the one that shows how much you suffered from a certain loss: that is only poisoning you, nothing else.
Nothing is more dangerous than not accepting love relationships that are broken off, work that is promised but there is no starting date, decisions that are always put off waiting for the ideal moment. Before a new chapter is begun, the old one has to be finished: tell yourself that what has passed will never come back. Remember that there was a time when you could live without that thing or that person. Nothing is irreplaceable. A habit is not a need. This may sound so obvious, it may even be difficult, but it is very important.
Closing cycles. Not because of pride, incapacity or arrogance, but simply because that no longer fits your life. Shut the door, change the record, clean the house, shake off the dust. Stop being who you were, and change into who you are.